Rejection and Breeding Negativity

Writing is a tough business. Rejections are part of the game. They're not always nice. Sometimes they sting, sometimes they're insulting, and sometimes they can make us want to give up. Growing a thick skin is a must--if you don't, you're going to get hurt. It's tough, but you have to learn not to take rejection personally. The agent/editor in most cases has never met you. They aren't rejecting you. They're rejecting one particular project they don't feel is right for them for any number of reasons. But you have to learn not to dwell on them. Personal rejections can be difficult to accept, but keep in mind it's just one person's opinion. I like to think of them as a critique, of sorts. If I agree with the assessment made, I change what needs to be fixed in my manuscript. If I don't agree, I don't make the changes and realize that, for whatever reason, my writing doesn't appeal to that one particular person. If I receive a few rejections that state the same thing, I know I need to take a second look at my writing and fix whatever problem they're finding. If you're submitting a lot, you're bound to get a lot of rejections. Think of it as going for a job interview. For every open spot, there are hundreds of applicants. Your work may have been terrific, but someone else's fit perfectly with what the editor was looking for. So we have to just keep applying, knowing that someday we'll find an agent or a publishing house that's a perfect fit. It's when we let the rejections get to us that the problems start. Negativity can be crippling to a writer's career, and it's also contagious. Writers' groups are wonderful places to vent about the downsides of the business, but it's easy to get carried away. Too much venting without any positive comments can be harmful not just to the one venting, but to the entire group. If nothing positive is being said, odds are no one is getting much work done. We're in this together. We need to support each other through the good times as well as the bad, but when negativity takes hold the good news tends to get lost in the shuffle. Then the jealousy can start, and that's never a good thing. I've seen more than a few writers' groups fall apart that way. Remember this: You wouldn't be writing if you didn't think you had a chance at publication. When you get a rejection, don't question that you aren't good enough. The book market is very competetive and there aren't enough slots for everyone at once. Be patient, keep trying, and remember that positive thinking breeds more positive thinking. I'm off on vacation for the next week, so there won't be any new posts until I get back. Have a great week everyone! Lis:)